Comments from the Thumb: Character builds that took advantage of RAW oversights to create strange and often silly characters were an incredibly common sight in the 3.5 community. Who could forget the amazing brokenness that was the Grapplemancer? Or the Herdsman build, which put an army of cows at your disposal? One such hilarious build was the Cluckromancer. Just take a level of Commoner, take the Dragon Mag flaw Chicken Infested, and create an army of chickens. You could specialize in necromancy and raise an army of zombie chickens, or level up in Monk and Drunken Master and slap people around with a pair of nunCLUCKS.
This sorcerous origin strives to recreate the hilarity of the Chicken Infested flaw in 5e for everyone to enjoy once again. I'm...sorry I got so carried away with chicken puns. I also apologize for the Legend of Zelda references. I couldn't help myself.
The source of your innate magic is a wild and fantastic story. You were given sorcerous powers by a powerful being, perhaps a whimsical or mad fey spirit, who was particularly obsessed with chickens. For some reason, now you can't stop thinking about chickens either. Every spell you cast reminds you of them. The boom of your fireballs sounds so much like a rooster's crow. Your mage armor emits soft clucking that only you can hear. And you keep finding chickens in your bag, when you're sure you didn't put any there.
Starting when you choose this origin at 1st level, whenever you reach into a container or pouch, you may choose to produce a live chicken from within, regardless of the container's size or the lack of a chicken in that container. You may draw a maximum number of chickens equal to your sorcerer level + your Charisma modifier. Your supply of chickens replenishes when you complete a long rest. Chickens drawn in this manner vanish after 8 hours or 10 minutes after they die. Drawn chickens behave in a manner appropriate for a panicked chicken suddenly brought into existence by magic.
Master of Cluck-Fu
Starting at 1st level, you may treat any chicken as a finesse weapon with the thrown property and a range of 20/60, channeling your magic through the chicken to increase its effectiveness. A chicken wielded by you as a weapon deals 1d8 bludgeoning damage and is magic. This damage increases to 1d10 at 6th level, 1d12 at 14th level, and 2d8 at 18th level. You are proficient with chickens as weapons.
Beginning at 6th level, whenever you take the Attack action with a chicken on your turn, you may spend 1 sorcery point to attack twice, instead of once. At 14 level, you gain the ability to attack three times for 2 sorcery points.
At 14th level, you gain the ability to influence your avian allies. You learn the find familiar spell if you don't know it already. The spell doesn't count against your number of spells known. You may summon more than one familiar at a time; however, they must all be chickens. You may have a maximum number of chicken familiars equal to your Charisma modifier, which are all summoned with a single casting of find familiar. If you are in physical contact with one of your familiars, you may take advantage of its Glide ability, hanging from its legs in a very physics-defying manner. Your familiars also have the ability to attack on their turns, using your spell attack bonus for attack rolls and adding your Charisma modifier to damage rolls.
Apeckalypse from the Sky
At 18th level, you gain the ability to call forth feathery wrath on your enemies. As an action on your turn, you may summon a massive swarm of chickens from afar. These chickens peck and scratch all hostile creatures in a 30 foot radius centered on you for a number of rounds equal to your Charisma modifier. When the swarm of chickens appears, each creature in it that is hostile to you must make a Dexterity saving throw against your spell save DC. A creature takes 8d6 slashing damage and 8d6 piercing damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one. A hostile creature must also make this saving throw when it enters the swarm’s area for the first time on a turn or ends its turn there. You must finish a long rest before you may use this feature again.
Tiny Beast, unaligned
Armor Class 12
Hit Points 4 (2d4-2)
Speed 40 ft.
STR 2 (-4), DEX 14 (+2), CON 8 (-1), INT 2 (-4), WIS 12 (+1), CHA 6 (-2)
Senses passive Perception 13
Glide. When a chicken falls, it does not take falling damage and may travel 20 feet in any direction for every 10 feet it falls.
Beak. Melee Weapon Attack: +4 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 1d4+2 piercing damage.